friends turned lovers is literally my favorite trope - like, all other tropes can go home.
give me shared inside jokes that date back to wayyyyy before a first kiss was ever shared. give me living together with separate bedrooms until one of them gradually becomes unnecessary. give me confused reactions from people who already assumed the two of them were dating. give me arguments over what counts as an anniversary because should we start at the date we met or the date we became friends or the date we got over our stupid selves and finally started kissing.
give me stories that show the line between friends and lovers is a really, really thin one - that appreciating the friendship that two characters share doesn’t mean you can’t ship them really damn hard too. that you can keep all the awesome friends-being-assholes-to-each-other stuff and add on all the shippy stuff to get something extra special awesome.
give me all of that.
Q:Hi Jin! You seem like a very optimistic and confident person but I was wondering, when you look at yourself, do you ever feel insecure or unsatisfied with how you look? If so, how do you cope with it? Sorry if this question is too personal! :) Hope you have a great day!
To be honest, I’ve been meaning to write about something like this for a while. I get a lot of messages from people who are being hindered from doing things they want to try because they are unhappy with the way they look, and their self-confidence suffers.
I’ve been there before, and I know how that feeling sucks. While your inner self is of course ultimately more important, I can understand how we can still be heavily affected by our outer appearance. After all, that is the image we present to others on our day-to-day interactions. In a lot of cases, people cannot help perceiving another individual visually first, before getting to know the person inside.
Although I carry myself with more confidence now, it doesn’t mean I regard myself as perfect. I honestly think I have quirky features and that I look kind of odd, but I’m really very okay with that!
As a kid, I was called some names and mildly bullied for the way I look. Because of that, there was a time when I wished I could get plastic surgery to change my features into what would be considered conventionally beautiful, so that people wouldn’t hurt me. It was a kid’s reasoning, and of course I couldn’t actually do it.
One night many years after that, I was looking at photos of an artist I look up to and admiring their features. Soulful eyes, bright, even if the skin around them was a bit darkened, perhaps from lack of sleep. Messy but expressive eyebrows. An upturned nose that looks a bit pinched but in what I think is an endearing way. A crooked smile with somewhat misaligned teeth that were smaller than they should proportionally be. The funny way they seemed to talk from just one side of their mouth. These features don’t sound ideal, but I honestly felt that this person was, and still is, one of the most visually beautiful people I have laid eyes on. And I felt that if they got plastic surgery to change anything about how they looked, I would be extremely sad because I truly feel they are perfect (or perfectly imperfect) just the way they are.
And in that moment I realized: If I can feel this way about this person who is so far from the idealized standard of beauty, then maybe it is possible that someone could look at me and feel similarly. Moreover, it dawned on me that what I loved about that person’s features was amplified by the way their hard work and passion and kindness had inspired me and so many others in countless ways. That’s when I thought — Wow. That’s how I hope to be admired.
I don’t want an empty worship based on by chance being born with features that fall into a commercial definition of external beauty. There is no single universal ideal of beauty anyway, so if you just want every single person to find you good-looking then there’s no way to win that game.
So yes, there are times I feel insecure about some things, but I don’t let myself get seriously upset about them, nor do I wish I had a different face or body. I am not perfect, but I can be grateful for the people who can appreciate the features I was born with. Even better are the ones who go past my exterior and can acknowledge me for the things I do, and for who I am as a person.
Another option would be to help me redecorate the studio! :)
Listen to him. You may not want to take that other option. That’s a mistake you can only make once.
Have a happy weekend!
I gave this exact same advice to intern Vanessa! What a fun coincidence!
H av e a dose of de l ightful p ositivity care of our m ain man K e vin!
Kevin has now opened his inbox and his heart to your burning inquiries! Send your questions, and he’ll respond with audio! There are a couple of entries on the blog already, so check those out to get an idea of what to expect!
When Kevin isn’t answering questions, he passes the time by redecorating the studio with our interns. It is so very colorful here now. So many, many different shades of red.
Please send him questions. We are running out of interns.
Hey, Desert Bluffs and beyond! Check out our shiny new audio ask blog for Kevin! Here’s an intro post!
Q:Hi Jin! Since it's clear that Miguel is not your boyfriend, do you have a boyfriend? What qualities do you look for a guy? :)
Clear? Is it really? Hahahahahahahahaha
rockets knows wats up